Part Five: A Yuletide snowball of confusion.
Phil and Frankie were busily building the snowfamily in earnest, when they had an unexpected visit from a neighbor. The boys are afraid someone might think they have stolen the coveralls they are wearing, so Phil has decided to do the talking until they find out what the man wants. We rejoin our friends just after Phil has greeted the man with a “Merry Christmas.” and the man replies:
“Good afternoon gentlemen, and Merry Christmas.”
“Nice day for Christmas Eve, isn’t it? All this snow.”
“Yes.”
“We’re building a snowman. Actually a whole snowfamily.”
“I see. It seems that you two may have lost your way.”
“Lost our way? How do you mean?”
“Well, I mean, shouldn’t you be somewhere else?”
“No. This is the spot I’ve chosen. I’m not leaving until we’ve finished building this snowfamily. They have to be finished tonight, it’s very important!”
“Very well, I didn’t mean to excite you. Your friend seems to be having trouble rolling that giant snowball.”
“Oh, excuse me. Hey, Mr. Bunyan, you want some help with that?”
“Sure Babe, I could use a hand.”
“Excuse me, mister, I need to give him a hand.”
“Of course, but first, did you just call him Mr. Bunyan?”
“Sure, you know as in Paul Bunyan.”
“And he called you Babe?”
“Yeah, you know the blue ox. Of course that’s not my real name, I just let him call me that, you know, to humor him.”
“Come on Curly, this thing’s getting heavy!”
“Now he called you Curly.”
“Yeah, that’s what he usually calls me.”
“Are Moe and Larry around somewhere?”
“Moe and Larry? Ha ha, that’s a good one, mister. Listen, I’d love to stop and chat, but I really want to get this done.”
“One more thing, tell me, how did you happen to get here?”
“What here? We just walked out the front door.”
“Just walked out?”
“Yeah, the front door, same as any other normal person. Is that so hard to believe?”
“No, no, not at all. I didn’t mean to imply that you weren’t–that is, that there is anything unusual about you walking out the front door. Oh, look, here comes Officer Carson. Perhaps he would like to hear all about your snowfamily. Merry Christmas, Officer Carson.”
“Merry Christmas Mr. Gordon, gentlemen. Mr. Gordon, I have those toys we collected at the station all ready, I wonder if you could relay a message to Mrs. Gordon?”
“Certainly, excuse us gentlemen… I don’t think they can hear us over here. They seem harmless enough, but they refuse to consider leaving until they finish building their snowfamily.”
“This is a tough spot. I wonder how they got out?”
“When I asked them they said that they just walked out the front door.”
“Seriously? Somebody must have slipped to let that happen. Listen, you go back to your house and call Morning Rise, tell them two of their guests are missing. It’s a good thing the Rest Home provides all their patients with those orange jump suits; makes them real easy to spot whenever any of them wander off like those two. Look at them, poor souls, just out playing in the snow. I kind of envy them in a way. You know, when you’ve been a cop for a few years, you see some pretty unpleasant things; the things people do, I mean, and some days you wonder if the whole world has become nasty and mean and uncaring. Some days I ask myself where all the innocence has gone. Seeing those two reminds of what it was like to be a kid, and how nice I thought the world would be when all us kids grew up and changed it. Instead it seems the world changed us. Just look at those happy souls, they haven’t got a clue. Why if it weren’t for those orange suits, they’d just look like a couple of poor, dumb lugs who never grew up. ”
“Yes, but they are wearing the suits, and it’s no mistake. You can see the stencils: Property of M.R.R.H; Morning Rise Rest Home.”
“Yeah, you’re right. They’re a couple of patients all right. I’ll stay here and try to humor them. Most of the residents there are harmless, just so long as you keep them calm. I’ll try to talk these two into coming down to the station with me, but I won’t push it if they start to get excited, so just keep an eye on us. Try to let me know how soon the wagon will get here to pick them up.”
“Right. Be careful though, that one thinks he’s Paul Bunyan, and the other one has a split personality between Babe the blue ox and Curly from the Three Stooges.”
“Thanks for the heads up. I wouldn’t want him to get a hold of an axe and think I was a tree. Oh well, the only thing I see that he might go for is that snow shovel stuck in the bank over there. Here I go… Well, you two sure have been busy. That’s a mighty big snowman you’ve built there. How many more are you going to make.”
“A Mama and a sister and a brother.”
“Well, that’s very nice, a whole family. Say, it’s getting cold out here. Why don’t you fellows come with me to the station. We’ve got homemade Christmas cookies, and plenty hot to drink. That will warm us all up. What do you say?”
“You got ahead. We’ve got to finish this snowfamily.”
“You’ve got to finish? Well, then if you can stand the cold, so can I. I’ll just stay with you.”
“Would you like to give us a hand?”
“I think I’d better keep both hands free.”
“What’s that? I didn’t hear you.”
“I said I’m not free to help. Normally I love to build snowmen, same as you, but, I’m on duty, and well you know, the uniform and all. I wouldn’t want to get it all soaked building a snowman.”
“Sure, sure. Too bad you don’t have a nice pair of coveralls like these to keep you dry.”
“Yes, they certainly do look like they keep you dry. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a set of coveralls like that in a store. Do you mind telling me where you got them?”
Continued in Friends, Snowmen, Countrymen, Be of Good Cheer. A Tale of Christmas Time (Part 5b)
Click here to read Friends, Snowmen, Countrymen, Be of Good Cheer. A Tale of Christmas Time. (Part One.).
Click here to read Friends, Snowmen, Countrymen, Be of Good Cheer. A Tale of Christmas Time (Part Two).
Click here to read Friends, Snowmen, Countrymen, Be of Good Cheer, A Tale of Christmas Time (Part Three).
Click here to read Friends, Snowmen, Countrymen, Be of Good Cheer. A Tale of Christmas Time (Part 4 rev.)